Articles by News From Somewhere

We found 9 results.


US Urges ‛Genuine Democracy’ in Cuba
News from Somewhere – TRANSCEND Media Service, 31 Aug 2015

Secretary Kettle said that Cubans were misled into thinking their system was democratic just because they elected the people who run their government. This was not real democracy, because corporations were not allowed to vote. A problem in Cuba is that there aren’t many privately owned corporations, so it will be difficult to bring Cuban elections up to US standards.

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World Welcomes US Border Walls
News From Somewhere – TRANSCEND Media Service, 10 Aug 2015

T. Ronald Dump, one of 68 (and counting) contestants for the Republican presidential nomination, proposed a wall only for the border between the US and Mexico. But, as 67 other Republican contenders quickly argued, it would be relatively easy for Mexican rapists and drug dealers to travel to Canada and then invade the US across the northern border, so a northern wall was needed also.

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Changes to the List of States Supporting Terrorism
News from Somewhere – TRANSCEND Media Service, 11 May 2015

Dear Mr. President, as you will be aware, your decision to remove Cuba from the List of States Supporting Terrorism leaves a depleted List, consisting of only three countries: Iran, Syria, and North Korea.

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Nuclear Talks: Israel Demands Equality
News from Somewhere – TRANSCEND Media Service, 13 Apr 2015

The Israeli government yesterday demanded that it receive “equal treatment” to that in any agreement between Iran and the “P5+1” concerning Iran’s nuclear program. A possible further complication is that US agreement with the new Israeli position might lead the Iranian President to demand an invitation to explain to Congress why the Israeli government can’t be trusted.

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Threats Everywhere
News from Somewhere – TRANSCEND Media Service, 23 Mar 2015

The President: Well, now that we’ve dealt with the Venezuelan threat, I guess the world is a safe place for the Homeland again? Or are there any other dangers?
The Secretary of State: Well, there are some threats in Iraq. And Syria – those ISIS terrorists. Perhaps we should impose sanctions on their leaders.
The Chief NSB Advisor: We’re already bombing them. That’s stronger than sanctions.

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US Senate Votes to Sanction Venezuela over CIA Torture
News from Somewhere – TRANSCEND Media Service, 15 Dec 2014

The US Senate passed a bill imposing sanctions on Venezuelan for not having done more to prevent the torture of prisoners by the CIA. “As is well known, we have been trying to straighten out Venezuela for 15 years or more, but the recalcitrant government of that country refuses to be straightened. If it hadn’t been for places like Venezuela, we would have had much more time to keep an eye on the CIA.”

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Not Only Coal ‛Good for Humanity’
News from Somewhere – TRANSCEND Media Service, 27 Oct 2014

“Death is the basic source of jobs in Australia’s funeral industry,” the Prime Minister declared. “My government is determined to protect those jobs against the fantasist-terrorist doctors who are trying to prevent it.”

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Response to Questions at US Presidential Press Conference
News from Somewhere – TRANSCEND Media Service, 22 Sep 2014

So, are we at war with the TVBP (those very bad people)? I am glad someone asked that question, because it allows me to make perfectly clear that this is not a new war we are embarking upon. And no, it is not the old war, even though it’s happening in more or less the same place. Because I ended that war.

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US Navy Thanks Ukrainian Rebels
News From Somewhere – TRANSCEND Media Service, 28 Jul 2014

US Navy Admiral Boris K. Orloff, head of the Navy’s Department of Shortening Memories (formerly Public Relations) today announced the intention to present a medal to whomever among the Ukrainian rebels was responsible for the shooting down of Malaysian Airlines flight MH17. “We have been waiting for something like this for 26 years now,” he explained.

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